Parents - Banish Guilt Now!

By [http://ezinearticles.com/?expert=Nancy_Montier]Nancy Montier

"In 2003 researchers revealed that ... the amount of new information generated last year was about 23 exabytes. An exabyte is a million terabytes. A terabyte is a million megabytes." Diane S. Kendall in Parenting with Technology

A million million megabytes of information (a megabyte is about the equivalent of an average sized book) is a lot of data in one year. Parents are offered hundreds if not thousands of books, magazines, articles, support groups, chat rooms, websites, blogs, radio and TV shows, therapists, coaches, classes, workshops, church groups and more all with the good intention to support us in our parenting journey.

I believe we parents feel guilty. I coach moms who feel guilty about leaving their children when they go to work; and who feel guilty about not contributing financially when they stay home with their children. I've experienced both ends of that guilt stick! I've talked to Dads in their 50's who regret the time they didn't spend with their children as they grew up. Now they see their young adult children lost and adrift in our very complex world, unable to pull it all together to make their lives work. Are we doing enough? Are we doing too much? Should I take them to all these activities or not? So we anguish and become guilty over what to do and not do.

Parents become confused or frustrated with too much conflicting information. Banish the guilt and take charge! Here are four tips to help you manage the information overload and the guilt.

1. What are you certain about regarding your parenting and your family? Why? Do you and your partner agree on these areas? Keep these areas sacred in your family - you don't need to absorb new information to fix what isn't broken.

2. What are your dreams, visions and goals for your family? What experiences, outcomes do you want? What values do you want to emphasize in your unique family? Use these answers to evaluate the incoming data by asking, "does this idea move me closer to our family's dreams and does it honor our values?" If it doesn't discard or table the information for reading when it is relevant.

3. How much time do you want with your family? How do you want to spend it? Schedule it before your daytimer is full - it is more important than a meeting or going to the gym. Alos, take this time before you read new information on how to do it!

4. What parenting issues do you need more information on? Allow time and energy only for information that answers the needs on this list.

With all the information and the multitude of different values that are reflected in the suggestions, we families need to know who we are and stand firm in that. This is knowing our "Family Soul" - what gives our family heart and inspires us. I invite parents to close the window on the storm of information raging outside - books, blogs, advisors, etc, pummeling your home. Instead, cuddle up with the children to read, or play games, or do homework or housework. Select carefully the information you'll let in and banish guilt!

Nancy Montier is a Professional Certified Coach with 9 years experience. She woks with parents and families to design a family that works through the positive coaching tools used by individuals and businesses to create lives and businesses that work. Nancy believes parents need these perspectives, skills and tools to design their powerful, unique families in this complex 21st century. Learn more about her Peace for New Parents workbook and CD at http://peacefornewparents.com